Do you know your love language? How about your partner’s? It might be more important than you think!
When it comes to saying “I love you,” everyone expresses it differently. Moreover, many prefer to receive love in different ways, depending on their love language. The five love languages are giving/receiving gifts, acts of service, quality time, physical touch, and words of affirmation.
Let’s say your love language is gifts – hearing your partner say “I love you” might not mean as much as buying flowers. On the other hand, if your love language is words of affirmation, hearing a random, heartfelt compliment means way more than a gift. See why love languages are so important?
If you need a little help expressing your love, here are 100 ways to do it depending on your partner’s love language:
Gifts
People whose love language is receiving gifts almost always prefer thoughtful, personal gifts to expensive ones that don’t have much rhyme or reason. Here are a few simple (but thoughtful) gifts you can get your partner to show your love:
- Bring home their favorite dessert
- Get them a gift card to their favorite restaurant
- Share a funny meme
- Get them a souvenir while you are on a trip
- Pick some fresh flowers
- Send flowers to their office (or home office, these days!)
- Buy matching jewelry
- Buy a fun holiday card
- Gift them something they have been talking about wanting to buy
- Pay for a trip together
- Make them a playlist
- Create a collage for them with couple pics
- Write a cute post about them on social media
- Gift them an at-home date night where you do all the cooking and cleaning up
- Venmo them money for a coffee out of the blue
- Offer to buy a round of drinks for them and their friends
- Get them your favorite book
- Buy tickets to see a movie together
- Buy tickets to go see a local sports team
- Pick up a treat for them while you are at the grocery store
Acts of Service
If your partner’s love language is ‘acts of service’, you should brainstorm different things that you can do for them! Here are some ideas:
- Make their favorite dinner
- Meal prep for them for the week
- Make the bed
- Bring them breakfast in bed
- Fold the laundry
- Research a solution to one of their problems, e.g. find the best place in town for a car repair
- Offer to take a big task off of their plate
- Drive them to an important appointment
- Ask them what you can do to make their life easier
- Let them vent to you when they have a bad day
- Do their least favorite chore for them
- Get up early and make them coffee before work
- Wash their car
- Plan a date
- Remember to do things that they ask you to do, and try to get ahead of these tasks if they often ask you to do the same thing e.g. do the yard work before the leaves pile up or take the trash cans to the curb before they remind you
- Make them a playlist
- Give them a podcast recommendation
- Do the grocery shopping for the week
- Organize the fridge
- Plan a trip and handle all of the logistics
Quality Time
A lot of people believe that quality time is the most important love language – and for good reason! Prioritizing time with your partner is essential, even if it’s not your love language. Here are some ways to express your love by focusing on quality time:
- Schedule a date night
- Make a conscious effort to put your phone away
- Tackle chores like the grocery store as a team
- Grab a midday coffee for them
- Stay in bed together one morning
- Garden together
- Visit a museum together
- Go to the zoo
- Check out the aquarium
- Revisit the spot where you had your first date
- See a couples counselor to work on making your relationship stronger
- Use Relish, a relationship coaching app to improve your relationship
- Plan a technology-free camping trip
- Go on a romantic couples vacation
- Clear your schedule so that you can spend time together
- Play hooky from work so that you can hang all day long
- Plan a couples night with a group of friends
- Reschedule something so that you can prioritize quality time with your partner
- Take a cooking class together
- Sign up for a couples art class
Physical Touch
Physical touch is a super important part of any romantic relationship. When we say physical touch, sex is often the first thing to comes to mind. While, yes – sex is important – there are many other forms of physical touch that show your partner that you love them! Here are some examples:
- Give a massage
- Snuggle on the couch
- Stretch together
- Hug more
- Sit on the same side of the table
- Hold hands
- Make up a secret handshake
- Kiss them when you leave the house
- Hold hands in public
- Walk with your arms around each other
- Take a dance class together
- Prioritize intimacy!
- Schedule sex if you need to
- Extend foreplay before you have sex
- Play footsie at the dinner table
- Rest your head on their shoulder
- Take a bath together
- Kiss them on the forehead
- Give them a back scratch
- Play with their hair
Words of Affirmation
In addition to saying those three magic words – “I love you” – you can also show your partner you support them. How? By being verbally supportive of their goals, actively listening to them when they talk to you, and going out of your way to talk about the things that you love about them. Here are some ways to express your love using words of affirmation:
- Tell them they’re doing a great job
- Say you are proud of them
- Tell them you are grateful that they are in your life
- List out all the things you love about them
- Give them a compliment
- Praise them in front of other people
- Tell them you love them as they are walking out of the door
- Work on saying something kind after having a fight or disagreement
- Write them a love letter
- Write a poem
- Write a song about them
- Leave sticky notes around the house with things you love about them
- Send a cute good morning text
- Send a sweet good night text
- Call them when you have a spare minute during the day, just to say you are thinking about them
- Leave them a voicemail that shares a memory you have with them
- Send a cute voice message over text
- Tell them about you a dream you had about them
- Share your favorite memory you have of them
- Call them to say you miss them when they’re away
Knowing the different ways to say “I love you” in your partner’s love language is a great way to bring you closer while strengthening your relationship. Your partner will appreciate the effort, and you’ll enjoy how happy it makes them!
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